Monday, February 18, 2008
a circle street with no end
i can't sleep

i wanted to sleep before going for work later tonight

but hell, this always happens

so many thoughts going through my head

i love my job, really, but sometimes i hate it so much too

it's a blessing and a curse

at those down times, you really can't just say " i quit "

it's the same cycle over and over again

you see things from a different point of view

the eyes still haunt me sometimes. some days more than others

god i miss being a civilian

i just want to run away, hide myself in a corner and curl up

selamatkan ku?

1. Amy Winehouse - Love Is A Losing Game

2. Jonas Brothers - When You Look Me In The Eyes

3. Buck Cherry - Sorry

4. Lenny Kravitz - I'll Be Waiting

5. Kanye West ft Chris Martin - Homecoming

hmm, the 5 songs that i've put in my playlist when i go to and from work. But out of all of them, my most favorite one is;


 Tuesday, February 12, 2008

first of all, this is going to be a highly emotionally fuelled post:

i don't mind people drinking, but what i abhore most of all is when people do not know the limits and over-indulge. that was one such case i went to : AI, or alcohol intoxication

you bloody fcuker. we were trying to help you. i don't mind the curses you spat here and there. god i've been cursed a heck lot of times in this line of work. so what. what pisses me off is the fact that you couldn't recognise the fact that we were helping you.

now my hand has some scratches from you. fcuk.

i really hate it when people don't appreciate the fact that you have helped, or are helping them. in their moment of anger or craziness, they can forget and start treating you like a doormat, or like we're insignificant.

i don't mind when people forget the things i did for them. it's ok. i guess in their state of anger they forget and treat you like nobody.

i guess in a few months that drunk uncle will probably forget who helped him when his head was bleeding. that's fine by me. he means nothing to me anyway. not a friend, not even a casual acquaintance of sorts.

but please, to all the people that drink; drink responsibly yeah. please
 Thursday, February 07, 2008
offrun
all i can remember is coming into my mum's room and saying, " ma, shaliz tak sedap badan "

my mum told me that after i said that, i sort of slumped and rested myself against her bedroom wall. she brought me into the shower and just bathed me in cold water cos my body was very hot, and yet i was shivering

she then brought me to NUH at around 1plus am in the morning.

MC 4days. severe diarrhoea.

fcuk. haven't felt that bad since i don't know when.

my headache is killing me right now. going to rest. haiz